The Olaf Timewaster

Hillsong: I Heart Film

2009-10-29T14:34:00.001-07:00

758!

2007-08-11T21:22:00.001-07:00

At the beginning of the season I was hoping to get a chance to see a record-breaking homerun this season. It turns out I did, only not the one I originally thought of. Every HR Barry hits from here on out is a record breaking one, so last night’s trip to AT&T afforded me the opportunity to witness history in the making. I know everyone has their opinions on Barry and “the record” but you can’t deny that the man knows how to hit a baseball.

You can feel it when he’s at the plate and see it in the pitcher’s eyes. No matter what the count is, the mound is never ahead when Barry’s at the plate. It seems like he takes pitchers to a full count just for fun. He learns from a pitcher the more times he’s up to bat. There was no doubt about HR 758…We were in a suite right above & behind home plate so we weren’t close enough to see everything, but the TVs all around the place give you a good idea. Looking down at the diamond I could just tell that he was about to hit another and it happened. The place went nuts. The frenzy for the ball was manic again. Barry trotted around the bases and tipped his cap to the crowd as usual. Another great hit.

But the Giants as a team are another story. Going down the tubes like a kid on the Coke slide…. They had a 4-run lead at the top of the 8th and managed to give up 6 runs that inning while turnstyling through 5 pitchers. There were chances in the bottom of the 8th and 9th but managed to turn a 6-2 into an 8-7 lost to the Pirates. Two teams battling for last place. What a joke.

The park is still a nice place to go, though. My camera batteries were dead and the charger nowhere to be found, so I didn’t get any photos/footage of the evening. Instead here is my trip from June…

Year 7: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

2007-08-08T09:43:00.000-07:00

Finished last night…Finally! (I won’t be discussing much of the plot for fear of spoilers)

I’ve had the book for two weeks but have been unable to get to it until this past weekend because I wanted to re-read all of the books in anticipation of the final one. My plan was to read each book then see each movie respectively (read1, watch1, read2, watch2, etc…). I thought if I started at the beginning of July I would be able to hit The Order of the Phoenix in stride, then read the Half Blood Prince immediately after that in preparation for the July 21 release of book7. I thought the plan was sound, but it didn’t quite work out that way.

Plans were set to watch OOTP on a Monday and by the Sunday before I still hadn’t finished reading Goblet of Fire, so I watched the movie instead and then watched Order the next night. Then the wheels came off…it took another 10 days to finish book5 and by then book7 was already collecting dust! I made up for it in the last week, though. It was really exhilirating reading and watching the 10-year plot (17, really)unfold over the past month. I’d recommend my plan to Potter fans and I plan to write some spoilers in the future dealing with essential items (imho) left out of the movies so that someone unfamiliar with the books will be able to understand some of the inner workings behind the scenes.

But enough about me, let’s talk about Harry some more.

Book6 was a mild departure from the standard HP story structure, even moreso than book5. Without spoiling anything (I hope), I’ll say you get to spend a lot of time with Harry & Dumbledore exclusively and learn a great deal about Tom Riddle. The setup at the end leaves you almost depressed (if you care about these fictional characters) because you realize it will really never be the same again. Dumbeldore tasks Harry with finding a way to kill Voldemort. You knew this was coming from book1, so it’s nothing new, but it brings a finality to the story you expect but never expected. It’s been an annual experience since 1998 - either a new HP book or movie -and now it’s finally over. Bittersweet.

Book7 finds Rowling both at the top of her game and succumbing to repetition to drive the point home. I’m certainly not one to criticize writing skills (English was my worst subject) but I’m sure 25 pages could have been saved by cutting out half of the references to either Harry’s scar hurting or Hermione repeating her “I told you so / Dumbledore told you so” schtick. We get it! Really we do! I know it makes them seem more real but it can bog down the story at times. This has happened more and more over the last 3 books as we learn of the mind meld between Harry & Voldemort. The scar hurts…he can see V’s mind…everyone tells him not to (Occlumency). But it keeps coming up over and over.

That’s a small gripe to have, though, in the grand scheme of things because when the story flies, it soars. The action is so fast-paced and fierce in this one you probably need the slowdowns to catch your breath. Major and minor deaths come aplenty and the final Battle For Hogwarts is a breathtaking sight to behold (in my mind’s eye anyway). The answers also come fast & furious but also subtely. I’ll probably need to read it again to grab everything, but it must now be clear that J.K. Rowling knew the entire story from the beginning.

This is no small feat which was begun in 1990 by happenstance. By the time the first book was finished it seems all 7 could have been finished. I’ve heard that the backstory notes she keeps have grown to quite a large size and that helps me realize again that this is possibly a once-in-a-lifetime (at least a generation) phenomenon. Many small details littered throughout the first six books yield a bounty of information at the end. Harry’s progression as a wizard and a person come to fruition as he finally becomes the hero we’d always hoped he’d be.

This is a highly emotional story with friendships and familial ties tested to their very core. I smiled & teared up many times and found myself inwardly cheering (with an outward “YES!” here and there) as Harry continually stepped up to the plate. I was on edge from reading the jacket cover & dedication which clearly state this is the end of Harry’s story and therefore our time with Harry as readers. Like I said, bittersweet.

It’s impossible to isolate book7 from the rest of the books (especially book6). I doubt someone could pick it up (even with just the movie knowledge) and feel moved by the details of the story. Maybe that’s a problem for people or publishers who think a book is supposed to stand on its own (I’m sure Scholastic and Bloomsbury are crying all the way to the bank) but it has never been presented as anything more or less than a 7-part story and that sense, as well as one of completion, comes by the time you finish the last page.

How G.I. Joe (actually COBRA Night Raven) Killed Santa Claus

2007-06-14T17:21:00.000-07:00

As everyone knows the new Transformers movie is coming out soon. I took this opportunity to dust off my old TF comic books from the garage and bring them inside. Since the commercials are on TV more often now my kids have caught on to the fact that this is something marketed to them. Only one problem: they are girls.

How sexist of me, I know.

But when I was growing up and amassing my Transformers toys and comic books I don't remember girls coming over to play or meeting up with them at the comic shops. Still, somehow, my girls are interested because they know that toys are associated with the movie (Darn you Madison Avenue!!!!) and I casually mentioned to them that I still have some TF toys in boxes out in the garage.

Big mistake!

Now it's an everyday inquisition: "Have you gone to the garage yet Dad?" "Did you get your Transformers yet Dad?" "Can we see them now Dad????" So on Tuesday I decided to wade through that jungle that is a West Coast garage (cars not allowed!) and look for old toys that have somehow moved with me 6 times since I left home.

I found my old Sega Genesis and some old Zoobooks the kids might like. I also stumbled across my original Millenium Falcon looking a little worse for wear. Underneath the Falcon was a black garbage bag. When I opened it up the memories, which make up the crux of this story, came flooding back.

.....................

When I was 9 or 10 and in Cub Scouts or Webelos or something my Mom was a "Den Mother" and we were having a meeting at my house. Somehow the subject of Santa Claus came up and I stated that I still believed in Santa. Instantly it was like I was on the outside of some inside knowledge that everyone knew but me. I had never heard of any other kids not believing up to this point, but they all knew something I didn't. The adults handled it well, but there was some level of mutual shock felt between me and the boys. Even my best friend Mike didn't believe!

So it got me to thinking.... What it if wasn't true? Santa not real? Who's leaving presents?!?!!

Christmas season came and the big ticket item on my list was the Raven: a sleek looking plane that reminded me of the stealth bombers I had just heard about the military having. It was expensive and I knew that the most expensive gifts were always given by Santa.

One day I was at my dad's office and he stepped out to go talk to someone. I played around on his desk and dropped something behind the desk. I crawled on top of it, looked behind the desk, and there in a shopping bag was the Raven box! Homina homina homina...I was getting it for Christmas! w00t! I casually picked up whatever it was and went back to playing.

My dad came in the door a few moments later and we went home. On the way home he said, "Now son I completely forgot but I had a Christmas present for you in my office. If you've seen it I want you to tell me and we'll just give it to you now. Did you see anything?"

My heard was racing! What could I say? I'd hate to spoil the surprise. And there's something anticlimactic about getting gifts early...especially one of this magnitude!

"No," I lied. And that was that. My dad didn't say anything else. Remembering back now I know my dad had a huge window in his office on the wall that the desk was up against. And I think he was talking out in that hallway that the window opened up to, so it's not unthinkable that he could have seen my entire escapade. But he never let on that he knew. It's one of those things I wish I could have asked him...

Anyway, cut to Christmas Eve (we used to open our gifts on Christmas Eve then wake up to Santa gifts in the morning) and I opened all of my gifts. Surprisingly none of them were in huge boxes and the Raven was nowhere to be found! I had a sinking pit in my stomach but I had to put on the happy face because I couldn't show that I knew there was another gift coming.

Santa used to always leave notes on Christmas morning after eating the cookies and drinking the milk. That year I had studied my dad's handwriting so I would know for sure if he left the note. We went through the milk and cookies routine and I went to bed. My heart was pounding in my chest. I was about to uncover the greatest mystery of my short life!

In front of the fireplace the next morning, as you can guess, was the COBRA Night Raven in all its glory. I was elated and devastated all at the same time. I checked the note on our fireplace mantle and it was written in cursive. My dad always wrote in BLOCK letters....I was foiled! But the jig was up at that point. I knew the real deal and that was the last year "Santa" visited me.

I never said anything to my parents but there seemed to be some sort of understanding because I didn't do the milk & cookies thing after that. I hung the Raven from the ceiling in my bedroom and though it was fully assembled I never played with it. My sister came along a few years later and we got to start the tradition again but that darned COBRA commander and his unquenchable thirst for military aircraft killed my Santa Claus.

................

Languishing in that black trash bag for umpteen years was the Night Raven. I pulled it out briefly and saw a layer or two of dust on top. It seemed to be intact with many accessories at the bottom of the bag. The moment I touched it all the memories I just shared with you came flooding back. The mind is a funny thing....

I put the Raven back in the bag, then back in the box underneath the Millenium Falcon. I grabbed the Zoobooks, turned out the light and locked the garage door.

Transformers treasure hunting would have to wait for another day.

What I'm Watching

2006-12-09T15:24:00.001-08:00

This fall I've found myself watching more TV that I have in the last 6 or 7 years. Normally my TV watching increases in the fall because of football season, but I'm also watching more network shows that ever before.

Many moons ago I pared back my cable choices to the most basic (called Limited Basic in my Comcastic land) which seemed to be good enough. Sure, I'd miss Comedy Central & ESPN and the kids would miss Cartoon Network and Disney, but we got by just fine. Then a few years ago I decided to get an HDTV and subscribed to the HD (only $5 more!) stations that were offered. This added a few channels (namely INHD, DiscoveryHD and ESPNHD) that had some good programming I'd been missing, but I didn't increase very much...

At this time my main TV shows were 24 & American Idol (sue me...whatever) and that's about it. Then I started reading about The Office, Lost, & Arrested Development. Over the summer I rented the 1st season of LOST and got hooked, so I knew that was on my list for the fall season. Same thing with Arrested Development. I wasn't sold on the office quite yet. So I added 2 shows and tentatively a 3rd. Still no biggie because 24 & Idol didn't start until January anyway so the fall was open! Jason Lee is a favorite of mine and since his new show was on before the Office, it didn't hurt to add that too.

Somewhere in here I decided I needed a DVR so I went with Windows Media Center. Of course this (last fall) happened to be the demise of AD and the rise of the Office. I also sprinkled in some shows my wife likes more than me: House & Numb3rs. So the next summer was spent watching the British Office series and catching up with American Office episodes I missed.
At the beginning of the summer NBC started an intriguing (now genius, I say) campaign for Heroes that was enough to get me to watch. Friday Night Lights seemed too teenagey-O.C. for me and the while the movie was good it was not great. Really only one television show survived from silver to living room screens (M.A.S.H.). The last one that tried (if I remember correctly) was My Big Fat Greek whatever. BFG the movie was far more popular than FNL and that TV show tanked. Studio 60 & 30 rock had people I liked, but they seemed like the same show. I can't watch everything every night, so I limited myself to adding Heroes (M) only and sticking with House (T), Lost (W), Earl & Office (Th), Numbers (F).

So with this fall it was going to be 1 hour of programming every night (not counting sunday & monday football) which seemed like more than enough for me. What I didn't count on was catching the end of the pilot for Friday Night Lights. It floored me and I became an instant fan. What can I say? Then NBC moved Scrubs to Thursdays when I'm watching NBC anyway...this could turn out to be more hours than I bargained for. AND 24 & Idol start up in January competing with at least 2 shows I'm watching on NBC....egads.

How did I come to nurse at the boob tube?

(The rest of the article is at Gone-Elsewhere)

Fame!

2006-07-15T10:31:00.000-07:00

No...not the musical. Just fame itself.

For as long as I can remember, I have wanted to be famous. Not that I'm doing anything to further that along. I guess I just want it to happen to me out of the blue. If that isn't the definition of wishful thinking, I don't know what is. But why do I want to be famous? Is it the fortune? Glamour? Recognition? Hey, as long as we're wishing here....

Though I read about famous people everyday, it's rare (maybe not ever) that I've read about someone being so happy that they're famous. Perhaps it's considered bad form, but no one says "Man, I'm just so glad that everyone knows me. I'm really happy with my high-level of fame right now." But would that necessarily be a bad thing? It may be hard to say without sounding pridefully pompous, but I honestly think it would be fun to be famous.

Sure, the paparazzi would get in the way if you were uber-famous. And there's always a wrong kind of fame (think infamous...but not in-famous). But I think I would love to do interviews, premieres, junkets, talk shows, tours, etc... Whatever it took!

I'm not much to look at though. Just a plain guy from California who works with computers (there's an original storyline). I see a gameshow contestant get famous and think, "I could do that." I see a reality show performer and think, "I could do that." See a blogger get famous because they reported the right thing at the right time in a humorous way..."I could do that." But is fame on the Internet real fame? Fame in name only? A flash in the pan?

Why am I worried? I'm not doing anything to further this. Just spinning my wheels while I study for the next Microsoft exam. One out of hundreds of thousands of certifications. Nothing too famous about that....

My fanatic article

2006-06-09T11:45:00.000-07:00

A link to my elsewhere article about the Cup.

2006-05-22T12:53:00.000-07:00

Growing up....green?

2005-11-04T00:05:00.000-08:00

I've been a Raiders fan as long as I can remember. Oakland, L.A., or Oakland - doesn't matter. I love me some Silver & Black.

I can remember being 4 years old and wearing my #33 Kenny King pajamas. Did I write that? I had KENNY KING PAJAMAS! How does a 4 year old have a favorite player? I can guarantee you that I had no idea what Kenny King did. It was all about the name. When you're 4 being a king seems like a cool job. This guy already had the name... And it was alliterative! (again, not that I knew what that meant)

Plunkett, the Tooz, Marcus Allen – these guys I knew better than my teachers at school. I knew that Marc Wilson was one of the worst things to happen to the Raiders, just like Bo Jackson was probably the best (until that fateful sideline tackle.. FREAKIN’ BENGALS). Steve Beurlein was the bomb – Todd Marijuanovich simply bombed. I could go on and on about crap quarterbacks or coaches (here’s looking at you Joe Bugel), but that doesn’t mean I ever stopped rooting for them. Like I said, a fan for life.

At least I thought so.

One day my dad let it slip that during the Raiders-Eagles superbowl I was rooting for...the EAGLES! What? I was only two or three years old...perhaps I was delirious...teething...something! But it slowly sunk in that green had always been my favorite color. I can see why I was drawn to the green guys. Why did I change? What was my allegiance? How can I not remember?

I grew up in the center of California. Literally. If you were to get the halfway point between North & South and East & West of California, you would most likely land at Modesto. Therefore we were much closer to the 49ers and Raiders than the Rams or Chargers. My dad was a fan of the closest teams and I guess that’s why I was too.

Al Davis’ move to LA really hurt a lot of the fanbase and made others (including my dad) angry. I didn’t know any better. I was just a kid who knew to root for Joe Montana & Jim Plunkett, so I stayed true to both teams. I rejoiced in the 49ers’ championships and suffered through the Raiders’ horrendous losses (like 51-3 vs the Bills in the 1991 AFC Championship? I had to go to sleep after that one). I thought being a fan meant that you loved your one or two teams through thick and thin and hated all the others.

I often wondered how people could like any other teams. ESPECIALLY division rivals. Were there really people who liked the Kansas City Chiefs? Surely they must be faking it. How could they all hate the Raiders so much? And don’t get me started on the Denver Broncos. I just assumed only people in those cities were fans of those teams. I knew that every stadium had some Raiders fans in it, but certainly not vice versa!

Zeal is a funny thing. Growing up is even funnier.

Even a few years ago I was still writhing inside. Were there really that many Tampa Bay fans at the SuperBowl? A friend of mine (who had just moved from Colorado) was hosting the party that year, and he was rooting against the Raiders. Half-joking, half-serious, I asked him how he could like the Denver Broncos. He gave me an answer that caused me to grow up that day.

“Look at Colorado,” he said. “There’s nothing around. Denver is it. Look around us. What other states are nearby? What other pro teams are nearby?”
I started thinking...Idaho, Montana, Wyoming, Utah, New Mexico, Nebraska, the Dakotas....Nothing. (no offense to those of you in those states)
“Denver is all we have for hundreds and hundreds of square miles, so the fans cover a lot of ground. You have 15 professional sports teams in your state alone. [I guess he was counting football, basketball, baseball & hockey]. If you like football and you’re around the Rocky Mountains, the Broncos are your team.”

That was my literal light-bulb moment. In an instant he had given me a smidgen of respect for other fans when I used to have none (ok ok...more than a smidgen).

Nowadays I really don’t care who’s playing football on TV. I won’t turn it off because they’re not my team. I can root for Peyton Manning or Big Ben. Division rivals are still easy to root against. And I still have a few grudges (Tom Brady FUMBLED. I will never root for the Patriots as long as he is there....and you can forget about Tampa Bay while Gruden is around).

Relaxing my bias just a little bit has helped me in Fantasy Football as well. My first year I went with all Raiders (much like I still do in video games) and paid dearly for it. Now I know that when the Chargers come to town I’d better have LaDanian Tomlinson as my running back. It still kills me to the core - it’s like rooting against myself – but I’m better about separating fantasy from reality.

If only Rich Gannon were still healthy......or maybe Ron Jaworski

Talk About a Timewaster

2005-08-01T16:32:00.000-07:00

Sign up over at www.baseballtangent.com and you'll find an arcade waiting in the forums section. I'm sure they're available at many other forums, but this was the first place I found it. Addicting to say the least! How do these people get top scores???

Yo-Yo

2005-03-01T11:06:00.000-08:00

The best gifts can often be the ones we are not looking for. They may not be the items at the top of your list. Perhaps they are not on your list at all.
I just turned 28 over the weekend and received a few gifts. My biggest gift, however, was a new 50" DLP TV we got right before the SuperBowl. Needless to say, I had to agree with my wife to not spend any more money on myself...ever! So this birthday was very light and rightfully so. Seriously, watching 24 & American Idol in HD (high definition) every week makes up for my lack of gift quantities.
But this is not what I'm talking about. Oh sure, I have an Amazon wish list. I always *try* and point my family in that direction when they ask me what I want. I never can seem to remember what I want at the exact moment someone asks me, so I just point them to my wishlist. When I see things I would like, I usually log on to Amazon and add them there....then forget about it. It's always a nice surprise. But no one follows that list. Ever. I'm serious. I received 3-6 gifts on my birthday (do pieces of clothing count individually?) and none of them were on my list. Well, one was money and that's always welcome! And don't get me wrong I like all of my gifts (I'm wearing some today)....I just wonder why no one likes to go by lists?
Again, I have digressed. This post wasn't even supposed to be about my birthday. My thoughts centered around Christmas. Yeah, I know I haven't even written anything since before then and it's been more than 2 months since the holiday, but it's on my mind.
My wife is crazy about stocking stuffers. It's something I always - ALWAYS - forget. Bad husband! Luckily, she remembers and gets stuff for the kids. Her family always does stocking stuffers and, I recently found out, so does mine! Why didn't I remember this? Why did it never stick? I mean, I remember having stockings hanging from the mantle. I just don't remember getting excited about what was in them! I don't even remember what was in them! I was always looking forward to the big present Santa left in front of the fireplace.
OK Count...stick with me here. Focus. You've drifted again.
Stocking stuffers. Certainly no stocking stuffer is going to be on my list (unless you can fit a DVD or a CD in there) so I still don't eagerly await what's inside. However, there is always cool stuff in there. Like Nerds candy, or a desk calendar (Three Stooges this year!), or a miniature game or something else from childhood.
This year, in a stocking stuffer from my mom, I found a yo-yo. A yo-yo. Immediately I was thinking to myself "What in the world am I going to do with a yo-yo?" Come on, I'm 28 (well, 27 then) and who has time for a yo-yo? So I promptly set it next to some hand cream and purell lotion I had received in other stockings (do people not know that I'm a guy? hahaha) and tried to forget about it.
A few days later, after gathering together Christmas presents (that had already exited my short-term memory and stayed langushing downstairs in non-conspicuous locations), I saw the yo-yo again. It certainly looked cooler than any yo-yo I ever had as a child. The name sounded tough: "Yomega - High Performance Yo-Yo". It can't be all bad with a name like Yomega! So I broke open the package and wrapped the string around my middle finger.
Now, when I was a little kid, yo-yos were not my forte`. It would take about 3.5 seconds for the string to get all wrapped around inside itselft and drastically shorten the yo-yo until it became unusable. Either that or the thing would fall to the ground and never return to my waiting hand. Perhaps I never had the right kind...or the right training...at any rate, I was yo-yo deficient and all of those thoughts flooded my mind as I prepared to engage the Yomega.
This new yo-yo, however, was not like any that I had ever seen as a child. The plastic outsides were clear and you could see through to the wound string in the middle. On one side there were springs with little ball-bearings or something. Was it a trick yo-yo?
Half-heartedly, I flicked my wrist and unraveled the yo-yo. Upon reaching the end of its rope (haha...good one Count) it promptly sprang back up into my hand. Success on the first try? This had certainly never happened before. So I did it again. And again. And again. Each time a little faster and harder than before until one time it reached the end of the string and stopped at the bottom. I was confused because I could still hear it whirring in it's spinning motion. I remember people trying to "stall" the yo-yo or do tricks or whatever, but as I told you before, my experiences with yo-yos left much to be desired. About 5 seconds later, the yo-yo jumped back up into my hand. I was excited, so I tried it again. Same result! I had instantly become the greatest yo-yo'er in the world!
I called my wife in to the room to look at my accomplishments. Her face did not match my enthusiasm, so I called in our daughters (who are 4 and 5). They were astonished! I was like a magician in their eyes! Over the next few hours, I tried things I had only heard about: walking the dog, doing the pendulum, around the world,etc... Some succeeded and some slammed into walls and glass tables prompting harsh stares from my spouse. But I didn't care...I had gone from zero to hero on a yo-yo all thanks to the Yomega!
For the next month, I would grab that thing whenever I had the chance. My girls would come up to me and say "Daddy, can I play with your yo-yo?"
"Not right now, daddy is playing with his Christmas present."
All of a sudden, this item that I had dismissed as a lame gift had become my most prized possession! This toy that was as far from my wish list as hand lotion had transformed into the one thing I could not live without! Why? How? Hmm....good questions. I don't know. But it taught me a lesson (that I have heard over and over) in a more practical way.
You see, there are things in this world that we want and things that we need. We all know that we can't always get what we want and that we should be content by having the things that we need. Human nature is not always so and we find ourselves whining (no matter how old we get) about what want or don't get. Here's the point: if we don't take the time to appreciate what we have, we will never be satisfied with what we get! Of course we've all heard it, but it doesn't stop us from making wish lists. Oh, they may not be physical lists, but we have ideas in our heads.
In life we will have ups and downs (oh, Count, you slay me with the yo-yo metaphors) but as long as we love and appreciate the people & things around us, we will always be happy.....We may even be surprised by what we have! Our most prized possession may be wallowing in the bottom of a stocking!
The Yomega has been collecting dust for a few weeks. It sits on my dresser and I haven't pulled it down in awhile. But everytime I see it I remember this entire story I have relayed to you (tangents and all) and it reminds me to be content with what I have. I have been blessed with so much and all it took was a yo-yo from my Mom to really bring it home.

Grammar Got Run Over By A Reindeer

2004-12-10T08:56:00.000-08:00

OK. So I re-read my last post and was appalled (!) at the number of times I switched tenses while telling my little story. It's ridiculous and I apologize. But I've kind of instituted a "no editing" policy on my posts.
Perhaps I should institute a "proofreading" policy.....

Smell of Christmas

2004-12-09T18:05:00.000-08:00

Man, do I love Christmas. Not as much as a friend of mine, who e-mails every so often throughout the year with messages that say "only 187 days until Christmas," but definitely as much or more than most.
I love Christmas music. I love Christmas decorations. I love Christmas movies. I love Christmas spirit. I love Christmas presents (giving, of course). I love Christmas tastes. I love Christmas smells.
Eggnog is great stuff. I've taken a liking to the light kind. But even then I still throw in a little nonfat milk. Mmm mmm good! Eggnog shakes are something of a delicacy. Who has the best - McDonald's or Jack In The Box? Are there others? Please let me know!
What about the smells? The holiday blends brand of candles, cookies, coffees, teas, etc.... it all warms the heart and the soul.
And don't forget a Christmas tree. Real, of course. Let me regale you with a tale as old as 3 weeks ago:
The week before Thanksgiving my wife and two daughters and I went out to Home Depot for something trivial. As we step out of the car into the parking lot, something catches my nose. It's the faint hint of a Christmas tree (what are they...pine?). I got all excited.. "Smells like Christmas" I told my wife. She could smell it too. So I look and low and behold they are setting up Christmas trees in the parking lot.
I never knew you could buy them at Home Depot. They're really trying to become some kind of superstore here...I saw turkey fryers and Disney Princess tv's inside. But that's another story.
Anyway, as we're getting the girls out of the backseat (they are 4 and 5) I'm anxious to have them experience the first 'taste' of Christmas this year. So I ask, "Can you smell that girls?" - blank stares - "Smells like Christmas trees! Exciting!" - veiled apathy - "Can't you smell it?"
It was then that my world came crashing down and I realized how I have failed as a father thus far (hyperbole, of course) - My kids don't know what Christmas smells like!!
The first Christmas with my wife was spent in a tiny one bedroom apartment. We hung a (fake)wreath on the counter behind our stove, covered it in a strand of lights, and put gifts underneath it. We took a picture of it and it's a sad thing to behold, but always puts a smile on my face. At least it was something!
The next few years were spent in a townhome, now up two-bedrooms, and the girls came along in those years. However, we never did much more decorating than that. Then a 3-bedroom townhome for 3 years. We bought a tiny fake tree (18-in. high) that we set on a counter, hung some garland, lit some candles, had some lights inside, put presents in the living room somewhere, that was it.
Now we're in a larger townhome, but still a townhome, and I was thinking about getting a tree. I don't know why I hadn't done it the past 6 years...yeah I do. Just no space. Now we have some space. But since it hasn't been around, my kids have no idea what is involved with a real tree. My parents bought a fake one from Costco some years back with attached lights and everything. It looks GORGEOUS...but can you smell it? Heck, no. But when I was growing up, we got a real tree every year. A fun experience, really, and something that always signified Christmas for me. So when I thought of all the other Christmas memories growing up, I realized that we had many traditions. They were little, and I didn't quite know it back then, but when I stepped out of the car at Home Depot and took a whiff of the air it all came rushing back to me. So much so that I had to smile and what I smelled!
And there I was, having denied it to my girls for all the years they've been alive! For shame!!! They don't even know what it smells like...boo-hoo!
So this Saturday we are getting a tree....Something I've never done on my own (i.e. - without parents). Something I've never done with my family (i.e. - wife and kids). Something I haven't done in many many years. And I can't wait!
To buy a tree holder/stand/thing...to stick that stump on there and watch it sway this way and that and maybe get it straight.....to drop needles all over the living room while carrying it around....to hang lights and ornaments and,( dare i say?), icicles...to see my daughters' faces as we put presents underneath a tree, OUR tree, and watch the space fill up...
To wake up in the morning and come home after work, open the door, and take in the aroma. It's almost Christmas!
Can you smell it?

Travis Hoffman

2004-11-30T15:35:00.000-08:00

The first time I really ventured out on my own and found a band I really liked was sometime back in '93/'94. "The Crow" soundtrack had come out and it was THE rock soundtrack to get. Tons of great songs that I can't even bring to mind right now (how memorable); but there was one that caught my attention more than the others: "Slipslide Melting" by For Love Not Lisa.
There was a name I'd never heard before. How weird...I thought. I wondered if they had an album out. So, a trip to the Wherehouse turned up Merge, their major label debut with Slipslide Melting on it. I gave it a whirl and was presently surprised.
After following the strict rules of CD listening (which I didn't know I had at the time) I found that the "hit" (as usual) was not my favorite song. It was a song called "Travis Hoffman" which was a 6-minute song that never seemed to drag or repeat.
I won't go into long descriptions, but taking that one chance on FLNL and Mike Lewis really shaped a great deal of the music I came to like in the future and even today. I can sense their influence on my ears when I pull out the album every couple of years or so. I'm instantly transported back to the days I listened alone in my room or in the car. I tried to get others to listen, but they couldn't hear what I heard. Very few of my friends became fans of their music.
It was frustrating, but I was OK with that. Everyone needs to like what they like for their own reasons. Especially with music, you know? Become a fan of something because YOU like it...not just because everyone else does.
FLNL was also the first (and only) band I ever wrote a letter to. A few months later, I even got a letter back. I ended up on their mailing list and found out about the new band (Puller) and other things throughout the years. It was fun - all because of a soundtrack and a man named Travis that I'd never met....

How To Listen To A CD

2004-11-30T10:25:00.000-08:00

That's right. Your ol' uncle Olaf is here to tell you what's what in the ways of CD listening techniques. OK, you got me. It's just me spouting off on what I think. I'm a sham...this blog is merely opinionated non-factual gobbledeygook.
Anyway
Music is something I enjoy. I mean really enjoy. I love to listen. Something that irks me are people who only listen for one song...one hit...one person..with no intention of hearing the rest. They leave a whole CD/Tape/Album languishing in silence while the hit song gets played out.
I understand we're in the 21st Century and iTunes can allow us to choose only the songs that we love (uns, dos, tres, catorce...Bono!), but I really want to speak to those of you who have a record that you haven't listened to fully.
(Oh, by the way, record/LP/Album/CD/Tape....it all means the same thing in this post.)
Let me start off by saying that as often as not, the "hit" song release from an album is not necessarily the best song on the album. You've got a 50-50 chance of missing an amazing song or songs by not listening to the entire thing. Trust me...it's happened many times.
Also, it just doesn't make fiscal sanity to purchase a CD for $17 (or more) only to listen to "Smells Like Teen Spirit" over and over again. Please, you might be missing out on your own musical revolution!
OK OK...maybe I've convinced to you take a gander at tracks 2-12 instead of playing 1 on repeat. So how do you do it? Well, ideally it takes 2-3 complete listens. You've heard to not judge a book by its cover or don't count your chickens before they're hatched? Maybe look before you leap? Somewhere in that combination is what I'm trying to get at. Listen and you might learn. Listen before you leap (to the next song). Listen to love...or hate! You may find out the album is crap. That's the chance you take in our one-hit-wonder society.
But back to listening

Play the album through in its entirety. Preferably alone or in a room without distraction. Someplace where you can hear it all clearly. A car will work, but only ideally on a trip long enough to sustain one entire run-through. Some caveats: do NOT skip any songs, do NOT repeat any songs, do NOT read the lyrics yet, do NOT do anything else but listen. No TV, no talking, no video games, no phone, no reading (well...maybe reading). The goal is to get acquainted with each song and how it sounds.
Now it's time to get out the lyrics. If you don't have them with you, try and find them online. If you are driving, I cannot recommend reading the lyrics. The best you can do without the lyric sheets is to try and hear the lyrics. Listen to the entire album again while reading the lyrics to each song as it goes along. I've found that songs I love have lyrics I love even more. They redefine a song for me and it sounds forever different. Even how a word is said can change the entire emotion of the song (and therefore me as the listener). To me, if they lyrics are completely meaningless, it's almost as if the album is meaningless. If you've got something to say, say it. If you've got nothing to say, well, find someone who can! (This is not a slam on classical music, soundtracks, and the like. There is even some popular music I like that have ridiculous lyrics. Remember "When the dogs do find her, got time, time to wait for tomorrow to find it"? What the crap?)
Third time through is the charm. By now you've hopefully made mental notes of where the songs that caught your ear are. This is the time to go through and listen to the songs that, to you, earned another listen. You can really listen to each song you like and maybe even figure out why you like it! It's also a good time to read the liner notes. Who wrote the songs? Who played the instruments? Who was thanked? This stuff is important to the band/artist and shaped their album...it might be good to know!

Have you wasted 3 hours? Man, I hope not. Hopefully you now have an album that you know you like/love and you know why. Maybe you learned a little bit more about what you bought. My hope is that you have a greater appreciation for what went into what's in your cd player....

CD

2004-11-23T13:10:00.000-08:00

well...i was going to do some lines on cd listening habits, but my thoughts fail me. I gotta come back when I know what it was I was going to say....

Still Alive

2004-11-18T13:48:00.000-08:00

Man...how do you people do it? How do people post mulitiple times per day? Every day?
I'm certainly not the busiest man in the world, but this thing takes some time.
I'd really like to keep it going, but I need some more time. I have plenty of thoughts but I don't always get them down.
I'll write something soon.....

Website

2004-10-04T15:27:00.000-07:00

I'll update this later with some real random thoughts (I promise) but for now I just had to say that Count Olaf has a website! The REAL Count Olaf (I am merely an imposter). If you like your kidnappers fictional, maniacal and a little bit slow, look no further than www.countolaf.com

du Brasil

2004-09-28T17:20:00.000-07:00

So I'm trying to learn Portuguese. At least a few lines here and there.
I bought the 6-disc CD set from Barnes & Noble's for about $20. It's the Brazilian Portuguese and I want to learn because my mom is from Brazil. She was born there and came to America when she was 7. When I was growing up she taught me a few words here and there. However we really only spoke English and Portuguese is not something they offered in high school. Or even at my college, so i didn't know where or when I would learn it. Then a friend told me he was learning via the Pimsleur method, so I thought I'd give it a shot.
It's basically just a call and response way of learning. "Listen and repeat" is the phrase I hear most often on this 5-disc set. I say 5-disc because the first one is merely an overview/instruction manual. About 10 minutes into it, I realized it was word-for-word what I read before opening the cd's. It came with a little booklet that was the intro. After awhile I picked it up and read along with the cd thinking, "why am I wasting my time?"
It's split up into 10 lessons, two per CD. I'm on lesson 7 or 8, but I think I need to go back. It's been a few weeks since I listened to the last one.
I'm not sure how much I will know by the end. I can say the requisite "Hello, how are you?" "Good morning/afternoon/evening." "Where is the Hotel/Restaurant?" "Pleased to meet you" "goodbye" and a few other sundry items.
I guess that's enough if I ever wake up to find myself in the middle of Sao Paulo and don't know where to go. What I really want is to have a semi-correct conversation with my mom without stopping to translate back to English and then translate my response back to Portuguese. It would be fun to impress her....

Bipolarity ensues

2004-09-27T08:59:00.000-07:00

Back from the reunion and I'm feeling two things. Well, a jumble of emotions, really, but mainly elation and depression. I'm guessing you can figure out the title already.
Let me say, there was a lot of love in the house on Saturday night and Sunday afternoon. It was wild to see everyone all grown up. But we thought we were pretty grown up back then! Most people are married and many have kids now. Everyone has their own life far beyond the walls of or school years ago. Most of the people went through Junior High with me, so I had seen these kids every day of my life for 6 years (minus summers). Then we all split up and came back together 10 years later. That's insanity.
We all had to wear nametags and everyone felt sheepish shaking someone's hand while simultaneously trying to read the name on their chest. That part kind of stunk. I was really good with names in school! I even tried to study the yearbook before getting there, but there were still some flubs on my part. Oops.
I may be speaking for myself, but I think if we could have frozen that night in time, I don't think anyone would want to leave. We had so little time that we could only say whether or not we were married, had kids, were working, lived nearby or far away. That was the extent of how much you could catch up with someone. Even as my wife and I were leaving the event we were still shaking hands and introducing ourselves/reconnecting.
Time flew that night and it left me with a greater and more terrible feeling than I thought. I realized that everyone has their own life just like I do. Going to the picnic yesterday was great because it gave us a chance to see everyone in action with their kids. Parenting mode. But then you had to think about getting home early enough to get the kids to bed, because school & work still went on the next day. We all took time out to say hi to the kids from 1994, but 2004 keeps right on chugging along.
So my longing to keep in touch with everyone is back. And I know I'm kidding myself if I think I'll be in constant communication with everyone, but I'd sure like to try again. I know there's more to the last 10 years than the 2 minutes I gave people and vice versa. Most of us can knock 4 years out by just saying "college" but that still leaves 6 whole years. I want to know! These were people who shaped part of what I am today.....i cannot toss them in the junk mail pile!
If I thought about it long and hard enough, I could cry a river. I could also smile for days. The 8 hours I spent stepping back 10 years does not make up for the 10 years "lost." And it's cruel to try and time travel like that when life is still going on.
On the way home last night we were listening to Switchfoot in the car. The song "This Is Your Life" came on and I leaned over to my wife and said, "This is exactly the song I don't need right now..." half joking/half serious. I mean, the lyrics go "Yesterday is a kid in the corner. Yesterday is dead and over. This is your life - are you who you want to be? Is it everything you dreamed that it would be when the world was younger and you had everything to lose?" Just rip my heart out and throw it on the floor why don't ya Jon Foreman! =)
In 1994 I had no thought about where I'd be in 2004, but I do know I love where I'm at. I have the family I've always wanted and life it great! God is good! Sometimes, though, I just wish I had my old friends back....

T.D.H.S. - Yes!

2004-09-23T12:50:00.000-07:00

It's that time of life, I guess. The time when I realize that time does not stop for me. "Time waits for no man." It must be true because this weekend is my 10-year high school reunion. Didn't I just leave that place? In some ways yes and in some ways no.
Memories are funny things. Sometimes I can think about things and remember them like they are yesterday. But then I look over some of the names on my reunion list and I think, "sounds vaguely familiar. I know I'm supposed to know you, but who are you?" So I think tomorrow night I'll pull out the old yearbook and do a little who's who refresher.
I remember the principal of our school telling the senior class that high school friends and friendships are the ones you never forget. They're the ones who you keep in touch with forever. He said that some people say it's college friends but that wasn't true. High school is where it was at, he seemed to be telling us. It was a nice encouragement, but I honestly haven't seen or talked to most of these people since the last day of school or the night of graduation. Some have been more recent.
Travel back with me, though to 1994. Would you be able to view a page like this in 1994? Of course not...the world wide web was being born. E-mail was not as ubiquitous. So I did the unthinkable during my freshman year of college: I wrote a few letters, stuffed them in envelopes, put stamps on them and sent them through the mail! Snail mail! I know...it's pretty hard to believe for some of you kids out there. Some went to UC Davis, some Stanford, some UCLA, one Harvard, some stayed at the local JC, etc... Anyway, my point is that I tried to keep in contact as best as I could. At least initially. Then, in 1995, I found out that everyone at school could get an e-mail account!
It was all text-based through UNIX using some program I can't remember right now... I think ctrl-d was send. So I found out a few friends' addresses who in turn passed my name on to other friends. Into my sophmore year of college we had quite a good list going. We would send out mass e-mails every few weeks or so and it was good to hear from a few people. I found out about people getting married, what was happening abroad, what was happening at home...but then it stopped. Or I stopped. Either way, the message frequency dropped to like one per semester (if that). Then, after college, forget it. Everyone went their separate ways...college accounts got deleted...how were we to find people?
CLASSMATES of course. Now, if I remember correctly, it was free when I signed up initially. I found that many of my high school classmates (clever name) had signed on, so I was able to leave them private messages on that site to try and contact them. This lasted for about 4 people. All the meanwhile, I've got a career starting up, getting married, in the process of having two kids, moving multiple times.... So I'm just guessing everyone else is busy as well.
Thank GOD for Classmates (I never thought I'd say that) because that is how I received my invitation to the reunion. It came through e-mail (what a difference 10 years makes) and I was able to see everyone else's addresses. So I e-mailed a few and got a few responses. Everyone is happy to hear from everyone else. And you know what? They're probably friends for life.
This is not to take anything away from my college friends who are going through what my high school friends went through at this stage (6 years out of college and I think I'm down to an e-mail every few months and maybe a Christmas card or something). But my college friends were all over the age spectrum and I didn't feel any ties to my "class of 1998."
Those kids in 1994 are a different story, and I hope to see them all this weekend.

Guy-Pris

2004-09-22T22:59:00.000-07:00

I'll start off with a pronunciation: "Guypris = guy - preez"

Today I wore pants that are 32" long. Or so they say... They seemed to fit fine initially, but after each washing I'm beginning to wonder. Now, I know I'm gaining weight constantly (although hopefully not at too rapid a rate) so things can begin to fit snug around the waist/thigh/buttocks area. In fact, that's how I know I've gained weight.

Have you noticed that you can look at yourself in the mirror for weeks and months and not really see a change? But people come up to you at church on Sunday, at the store, or at the family reunion and say "Boy, are you losing weight? Are you gaining weight? Have you gotten taller? Shorter? Wider? Slimmer???" I almost never see it. But I can definitely feel it. Oh yes...once the shirts don't fit quite the same. Or a sneeze really makes to feel the tightening waistline. Oh ho ho yes. I feel it. And so it was with these pants

Anyway, these pants are continually getting shorter. I really don't think I'm getting taller as I'm getting wider. These pants go halfway up my shins when I sit down. As my father used to say, I'm "ready for a flood...got my highwater pants on." Needless to say, it can be embarrassing in a group of people.

So one day, a few months back, when I was sitting down with a group of guys while wearing these pants, I confessed to them my "short"coming. The jokes went immediately to the ladies' fashinable Capri pants and someone thought of the Seinfeld episode where Kramer and George's dad invent the "Bro" aka "Mansiere". So we all had a good laugh about my "man-pris".

But I thought guypris was closer to capris, so I'm sticking with that. AND buying 34" long from now on....

Why Timewaster?

2004-09-22T13:10:00.000-07:00

It may seem obvious at first, but there's more to it.

When I was in elementary school my best friend and I (shout out to Mike Winder...haven't seen you in ages) used to have a good laugh at the way we thought adults thought. We thought that they thought that anything exciting was not worth doing and anything that was boring they would love. My family took Mike with us a few times on trips to amusement parks. We would laugh about how some parents must just call rollercoasters "timewasters." You know...as if anyone would want to spend their money on "the timewaster."

It grew, over time, to mean anything fun that we enjoyed as kids. If we went to the mall and saw something we wanted (video games, toys, anything) one would always tell the other "I guess if you want to spend it on that timewaster you can." We'd explain things to each other in terms of "spending time on the timewaster yesterday" or whenever...

Something close to 20 years has gone by since that time and I wish I could spend more time on timewasters. My kids' favorite timewaster now is running up and down the halls. Back and forth. Time and again. Is life still that simple? I'll bet they'd call what I'm typing right now "boring" and wonder how I could waste my time on something such as this...